Comments on: Appreciation http://cwd.dhemery.com/2004/08/appreciation/ Dale Emery on Leadership Tue, 06 Jan 2009 07:10:32 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.5 By: Paul Leclerc http://cwd.dhemery.com/2004/08/appreciation/#comment-196 Paul Leclerc Tue, 30 Nov 1999 00:00:00 +0000 http://cwd.dhemery.com/2004/08/19/appreciation/#comment-196 As I was reflecting on this article, I thought of two recent experiences where my manager expressed appreciation for me and my reaction to it. 1) He left *1* movie ticket for each of us on our desks. 2) He gave me a $50 eAward (real cash or gift certificates) in appreciation for the "behind the scenes" stuff that I do that often times is unnoticed and unappreciated. The first instance still causes me great pain and anger. Why 1 ticket and not two so I could enjoy it with my wife? It was also not connected to any specific event or behaviour. The second instance came recently, most likely because our organization ranked very low in recognizing people. Maybe I'm being cynical. Both seemed very insincere and token gestures. My manager has shown in more obvious ways that he doesn't appreciate us (me?) by not listening, not encouraging dialogue, etc. So these attempts at showing appreciation seem disingenuous. And then it hit me while I was reflecting more on this article... These "attempts" at showing appreciation don't necessarily have to be viewed so harshly. He's attempting, however crudely, to show appreciation. I can perceive it as a cynical act or I can perceive it as an awkward attempt from an awkward person. At least he's attempting. I can either show bitter contempt or I can at least appreciate the attempt. I'm starting to lean towards the second. Thanks Dale for helping me to change my perspective. As I was reflecting on this article, I thought of two recent experiences where my manager expressed appreciation for me and my reaction to it.
1) He left *1* movie ticket for each of us on our desks.
2) He gave me a $50 eAward (real cash or gift certificates) in appreciation for the “behind the scenes” stuff that I do that often times is unnoticed and unappreciated.

The first instance still causes me great pain and anger. Why 1 ticket and not two so I could enjoy it with my wife? It was also not connected to any specific event or behaviour.

The second instance came recently, most likely because our organization ranked very low in recognizing people.

Maybe I’m being cynical. Both seemed very insincere and token gestures. My manager has shown in more obvious ways that he doesn’t appreciate us (me?) by not listening, not encouraging dialogue, etc. So these attempts at showing appreciation seem disingenuous.

And then it hit me while I was reflecting more on this article… These “attempts” at showing appreciation don’t necessarily have to be viewed so harshly. He’s attempting, however crudely, to show appreciation. I can perceive it as a cynical act or I can perceive it as an awkward attempt from an awkward person. At least he’s attempting.

I can either show bitter contempt or I can at least appreciate the attempt. I’m starting to lean towards the second.

Thanks Dale for helping me to change my perspective.

]]> By: Robert Watkins http://cwd.dhemery.com/2004/08/appreciation/#comment-197 Robert Watkins Tue, 30 Nov 1999 00:00:00 +0000 http://cwd.dhemery.com/2004/08/19/appreciation/#comment-197 Hmmm... it could also be a cultural issue. I find that Australians in general would prefer not to be thanked than to get thanks that they can't believe. We tend to be an overly cynical lot. Certainly I am... if asked if the glass is half-full, I wonder who drank the rest of it. Spontaneous gestures of appreciation are fine, and usually very effective in any society. It's just the organised form that would creep me out. That said: a group culture that doesn't have regular expressions of appreciation for the efforts of the members of the group is probably unhealthy. People need to feel that their efforts are desired, especially when they do go a bit further than normal. Hmmm… it could also be a cultural issue. I find that Australians in general would prefer not to be thanked than to get thanks that they can’t believe. We tend to be an overly cynical lot. Certainly I am… if asked if the glass is half-full, I wonder who drank the rest of it.

Spontaneous gestures of appreciation are fine, and usually very effective in any society. It’s just the organised form that would creep me out.

That said: a group culture that doesn’t have regular expressions of appreciation for the efforts of the members of the group is probably unhealthy. People need to feel that their efforts are desired, especially when they do go a bit further than normal.

]]> By: Bharti http://cwd.dhemery.com/2004/08/appreciation/#comment-198 Bharti Tue, 30 Nov 1999 00:00:00 +0000 http://cwd.dhemery.com/2004/08/19/appreciation/#comment-198 A bit late in the day for me to comment. One thing is clear, appreciation is a need whether at work or at home. A tiny acknowledgement of the extra effort put in goes a long way. we all as a habit are quick to criticise and laggards in appreciating, just flip the coin. A bit late in the day for me to comment. One thing is clear, appreciation is a need whether at work or at home. A tiny acknowledgement of the extra effort put in goes a long way. we all as a habit are quick to criticise and laggards in appreciating, just flip the coin.

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